5 Values that Empower Your Relationships

Be your best self with everyone you meet.

Live Your Best IMAGE

Using the principles discussed in my Self IMAGE program, you can release what no longer serves you in your relationships and replace it with a mindset, connections and actions that create harmonious relationships with others in all areas of your life. Self IMAGE focuses on your relationship with others by expressing your true IMAGE.

Here are the 5 values that empower your relationships:

• Integrity

• Mutuality

• Acceptance

• Generosity

• Expression

Analyze the underlying beliefs about your relationships with others. Question those beliefs and discover the truth, so you can create a new story that reveals your true image and relationships with others.

Integrity

The typical understanding of integrity is doing the right thing even when nobody's watching. It includes being honest and consistent in your words and behavior in accordance with your beliefs. Be sure to question your beliefs regularly as new information becomes available that might impact them. Another useful guideline is, “First, do no harm.” So test your beliefs, modify where necessary, then speak and act with integrity.

Responsibility

You are responsible for the only things you can control in your life - your thoughts, emotions, words and actions. Accept your responsibility for what you think, feel, say and do in every situation. Instead of “reacting” to others, know that you can adjust the way you respond when someone is saying or doing something that you are feeling triggered by. No one can make you feel a certain way, your response comes from within you, based on your past experiences and understanding of similar situations. You can change your response. Choose to respond in a way that moves the situation in a more positive direction.

Respect

Mutually respectful relationships are typical goals. Most people are familiar with some version of the golden rule - treat others the way you would want to be treated. If you follow the golden rule, you are likely to be respectful of others. However you may not receive respect in return, even though you are modeling it beautifully. Mutually respectful relationships begin with how you treat yourself. If you treat yourself with respect, you are more likely to train others to treat you with respect. Expect others to treat you with the same level of respect you give them and accept nothing less. 

Right Action

Again the typical understanding of integrity is doing the right thing even when nobody's watching, which is an excellent goal. Try taking it a step further. Aim to have right thoughts, right emotions and right actions. It’s much easier to say and do the right thing when you’ve started with the right thoughts and emotions.

Mutuality

Mutuality is when two or more individuals or groups of people have genuine emotions for each other and say and do things for each other. 

Win/Win Mindset

Mutual respect is a basic aspect of mutuality. Keeping that in mind as you step into meetings, add the mindset shift of expecting the result to be a win/win. When the result is win/lose or lose/win, the winner is afraid of losing to someone else later, and the loser feels like a victim and tries to figure out ways to win next time (and make the other person lose). Instead synergize everyone’s best skills and suggestions to create a better solution than either of you created separately, which results in a win/win.

Listening to Understand

While listening to others, most of us try to figure out what we’re going to say in response and miss truly hearing the meaning of what is said. Being fully present and deeply listening to the other person enables you to better understand them and to ask better questions to further deepen your understanding of their perspective.

Building Trust & Reliability

Always being truthful and doing what you say you’ll do will build trust and

reliability. 

Having shared agreements in a group creates safety by having all members commit to support and respect each other and the value of the shared space within the group meetings.

Acceptance

Knowing that you cannot change any situation, because it is not in your control, choose to accept everything that happens exactly as it happens. Once you have acceptance, you can more easily assess any lessons and the next steps that you need to take. Putting energy into resisting things that have already happened does nothing but deplete your time and energy, which could be better spent on moving in the right direction.

Energetic Connections

Being fully present and engaged is the only way to truly experience your life and to be in harmonious relationships with others. Be open, welcoming and accepting of others. Approach situations from a high energetic level to enhance your connection with everyone involved. You will find that most people will shift their energy to match more closely to your higher level. 

Radical Acceptance of All

Radically accept everyone and everything in every situation – to remove any negative power the situation might otherwise have over us. That doesn’t mean you won’t need to process some emotions around it, but you won’t want to live in them and drown in them.  It can sometimes help if we understand why, but we can’t always know, and sometimes we can’t understand when we do know why. So release the need to know, learn any lessons, process any emotions and radically accept it as it is.

Generosity

Just as you can’t get heat from a stove without first giving it fuel, you can’t receive your abundance without being generous with your resources.

Gratitude in Flow

Creating your best life experience begins with living authentically from your new story of your vision. It’s waking up in the state of gratitude for all your life’s abundance. Consciously choose to make the best use of your resources for the good of all, such as choosing to support local and organic stores or volunteering at animal rescues, whatever resonates with you and your values. Creating your best life experience is to live each day joyfully in alignment with your vision and values.

Give AND Receive

Practice the flow of giving and receiving until it feels natural. Reciprocity in relationships may sometimes appear unbalanced. You get to decide whether a relationship is acceptable or not. If you feel resentful in a lack of reciprocity, you need to determine the underlying cause and if you need to adjust your own thoughts or underlying beliefs. Although you may not receive the same monetary value you give to another, you often receive a rewarding feeling of equal value to your gift. 

Lack of reciprocity is often due to you not accepting what is offered to you. “Oh no thank you, you shouldn’t have…” Remember that when someone is offering you a gift, your refusal will likely feel bad for them. You are giving them the gift of a rewarding feeling if you graciously receive their gift. Again the goal is to practice giving AND receiving until it feels natural and doesn’t require a lot of thought.

Expression

How do you express yourself? Do you express your best self to your family and your friends? Do you express your most confident and competent self at work? Do you consciously present your best self to the world? 

Best Self 

What is your best self? What image would you like everyone to see in you? What persona do you describe for yourself in your vision? Step into the person you are in your vision of your best self. How would that person behave? What decisions would she make? You are already the person in your vision, so express yourself as that version of you.

Impact and Influence

When you live from your best self, you are naturally impactful and influential. Your authenticity and integrity are apparent. People are drawn to your high energetic level. Your invitation to know, like and trust you will be gratefully accepted.

In Flow of Oneness

Aligning your decisions and behaviors with your vision is living your best life. As you continue to express yourself more fully as the YOU in your vision, you will more easily stay in the flow of oneness, naturally giving and receiving, and accepting all with grace. Express yourself fully and authentically to live your best life.

More Empowering Relationship Explorations

In the next several blog posts, I will discuss the values that empower your relationships in more depth.

• 3 Mindset Shifts for a Positive IMAGE

• Shift your beliefs about yourself and others and the nature of your relationships. 

• 3 Ways to Create Harmonious Relationships

• Connect energetically and intentionally for mutually beneficial relationships.

• 3 Keys to Conscious Collaborative Creation

• Combine wisdom, compassion and gratitude to create a wonderful life.