3 Steps from Student to Mentor

Strengthen your relationships to feel more joy

Study and Mentor

The life cycle is summarized as Study, Apply, Mentor. You study and learn in your youth. Then you apply what you learn until you master it. Then you mentor others, sharing what you’ve learned, completing your cycle. My previous blog, 3 Phases of the Life Cycle, provided an overview of the life cycle. The last blog focused on ways to enhance your assimilation of the information you receive through study in its various forms. This blog focuses on your roles as student and mentor.

When you’re young, your natural instincts help you learn from parents and caregivers, then from peers and teachers. As an adult, you can choose to be more conscious about what you want to learn and who you want to learn it from. Then mentor others and continue to fine-tune your own skills while paying it forward.  To strengthen your relationships with yourself others and all life, let’s look at the steps from student to mentor:

• Self-Analysis

• Gratefully Receive

• Pay It Forward

The path from student to mentor is a cycle that continues to evolve. Take a look at how far you’ve already come. What skills or knowledge would you like to continue studying? What new skills and knowledge would you like to study? Gratefully receive opportunities to learn from others and from your life experiences. Practice to mastery and as you gain expertise status, mentor others to pay it forward. Let’s start with a self-analysis.

Self-Analysis

Fill a treasure chest with all your accomplishments, your relationships and the abundance you have received so far in your life. Put everything in, no matter how small or insignificant you think it is. Isn’t it amazing to realize how much you have already experienced in your life? 

You probably didn’t include a lot. I’m sure you didn’t include your first step, learning to crawl and walk, unless you were someone who had to learn to walk again after an accident or serious illness. People often downplay the skills that they think are easy. What are you really good at, that seems easy to you? Have others asked you how you can make it look so easy? 

Continue to add your treasures as they come to you. Release any comparison with others or what they might think is important. You can compare yourself with earlier versions of yourself in each specific area. What knowledge have you gained? What skills have you mastered? How much more confident in those skills are you now than when you were before? Are you earning more than you have in the past?

Would you like to have more skills than you currently have? Would you like to make the ones you have even better?

How many relationships do you have? How many of those are good relationships? How many are long-term? Do you have happy healthy relationships with your family? Do you have any close friends? Do you have good relationships with the people you work with and your boss? Are you self-employed and have good client relationships? Are you friendly with the people in your community? Do you chat with the clerks at your favorite stores? Do the bank tellers know you by name? 

Would you like to have more relationships? Would you like to make the ones you have even better with deeper connections?

Now consider how abundant you feel. Do you have all your basic needs met? Do you feel safe and secure? Do you have a home and food and clothing?

After considering your basic needs, consider how many material possessions you have that are important to you, from a computer and a smart phone to kitchen tools. What kinds of possessions do you own that you enjoy, but serve no other practical purpose? How many things do you have that are purely sentimental?

You can also have an abundance of experiences. Do you have a lot of social activities that you enjoy? Do you travel to places you enjoy, whether locally or far away? What other types of experiences do you enjoy? 

Would you like to have more possessions? Would you prefer to have less material possessions to maintain? Would you like to spend more time with family and friends? Would like to spend more time traveling? 

Another aspect of abundance pertains to your physical health. Do you have a lot of mental, emotional and physical energy? Are you physically fit? Do you have a healthy diet and exercise routine? Do you get enough sleep and relaxation? A healthy body is a wonderful asset in your treasure chest.

Gratefully Receive

While you assimilate what you learn in your unique way, using your own perspective and sorting in categories that make sense to you, you do not learn independently. You are interdependent with other people and the world around you. Even when you learn from experiencing the world around you, other people often help you make meaning of those experiences, especially when it’s new to you. Your connections with yourself, others and all life are valuable to lifelong learning. 

Think about all the people that have helped you through your life. When you’re born, you learn from your parents, other caregivers, siblings and other friends and relatives. As you get older, teachers, coaches and other authority figures teach you.

You might think of all the obvious people that you truly knew, but have you also considered the other people that you see in the community but don’t really know, or strangers that you barely interacted with but taught you a lesson. 

During a hotel stay years ago, I ate from their breakfast bar. The egg container was getting low, and someone spilled a little juice. A woman swooped in quickly and quietly with fresh eggs and cleaned the spill. I complimented her on doing such a good job. Her face blossomed in a huge smile, and she thanked me. 

The next morning, as soon as I walked into the room, she greeted me with the biggest smile and a good morning. She taught me that even a little gratitude can make someone feel truly appreciated. People truly remember how you make them feel. Now I consciously look for ways to express gratitude for all the little and big things that people do for me. I also notice and express gratitude when people do things to help others. 

Gratefully receive what others offer, even if you have nothing to offer in return. Your gratitude will feel like a reward to them. Don’t hesitate to ask others for help, and gratefully receive that help when given. 

You have an abundant life by the mere fact that you are alive. Open to receive all that life has to offer. Express gratitude for the sun and the rain, the green lights and the red lights, productive work and relaxing play. Express gratitude for all of the events in your life, those you consider to be negative as well as those you consider to be positive. Your positive events offer encouragement to continue. Your negative events offer you lessons and growth. Combined they molded you into the uniquely amazing human being you are today. 

For example, I express gratitude to the infertility that appeared to be a negative, because it taught me to appreciate the gift of motherhood and led me to adopt my amazing son. I would not change anything about my experience, because otherwise I would never have met him and felt such love.

Release any limitations you’ve placed on your ability to fulfill your life’s vision, based on any negative experiences in your past. Open to the possibility of learning new skills or knowledge, developing new relationships or deepening existing ones, and receiving all the abundance you can imagine in your life vision.

Open to receiving your vision and be willing to step out of your comfort zone to receive it. Be open to change. Face the fear of the unknown with your hopeful vision. Welcome the positive changes that fulfill your vision. Be willing to ask for assistance from your mentors. You deserve to achieve your goals.

Pay It Forward

When you’ve mastered any part of life, especially the things that come easily to you, know that you have a gift to share with others. Pay it forward.

Work skills can be shared with others looking for mentors. Be generous with your knowledge. Helping others gives you the added bonus of boosting your expertise, but more importantly, you’ll feel the reward of their gratitude.

Parenting a child on how to become a mature adult is not only a skill, but a gift that keeps on giving. Helping to care for others is a wonderful way to pay it forward. 

Do you have a hobby you enjoy that others would love to learn from you?

There are many ways to pay it forward. They range from full time effort to a few minutes, such as helping a youngster learn to tie their shoe or complimenting a service provider. 

Complete your life cycle by mentoring others to inspire the next generation to achieve their life vision.

Going Deeper with the Life Cycle

In the next blog post, I will discuss the phases of the life cycle in more depth.

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